To Double Major or Not to Double Major?

After years of debating, I finally did it. This month, I declared my major. At times, choosing your major can make you feel like you are living within the Divergent trilogy. Sure, I want to be in the Dauntless faction, but would I perform better in Erudite? In Divergent, once you choose your faction, you are cut off from access to any other factions and are bound to live amongst and choose an occupation within your specialized group. The decision practically dictates the rest of your life!

Luckily, however, majors are not that constrictive, especially at Barnard. Still, even with Barnard’s flexible Foundations curriculum, which allows students to double major if they choose, I struggled to decide on one key question: “Is double majoring the right decision for me?”

Let me explain. From the moment I began applying to colleges, I was resolute: I would be an English and Theatre double major. No modifications and, certainly, no exploration necessary. That was the plan, and I was planning on sticking to it. In fact, it was one of the most important factors that led me to choose Barnard. I had finally found a school that would let me achieve all of my academic goals within the span of four years.

And yet, from the very moment I stepped onto Barnard’s campus, I began to question my stubborn fascination with being a double major. I  came to learn that, despite being an undeniably impressive and worthwhile endeavor, double majoring would come at the expense of specializing in either subject and, more importantly, hinder my unexpected and growing curiosities for both environmental science and film. 

Why did I want to be a double major in the first place? Why was this so important to me, to the point that even when I was feeling overwhelmed about having to plan my entire schedule for my college career, or when I was trying to convince myself to suppress newfound academic interests, I wouldn’t budge? Frankly, it was a combination of many factors. The fear of being limited in career paths, the fear of losing an integral part of myself, of being a failure, and, partially, even the prestige of the title. 

I am not the kind of person who gives up when a task becomes increasingly difficult. In fact, the drawback motivates me to work harder than ever to achieve that task. This, although useful in certain situations, is not always the right reaction. In other words, I am stubbornly persistent, to a fault. Walking away from something that is ultimately hurting me more than it is benefiting me is still perceived as a failure on my part. And if a goal is beginning to slip away, I’m simply not trying hard enough. This, of course, is far from the truth but took me a whole year and a half at Barnard to grasp.

Double majoring is certainly an incredible and feasible option at Barnard. It just turned out this option was not the right fit for me or my academic goals. Instead of expanding my knowledge about subjects I want to further explore, double majoring was beginning to restrict my curiosity.  I’ll be honest: when taking classes in order to fulfill two majors, there are some academic sacrifices. You have to take a certain number of particular classes for each major. If you are fascinated by the curriculums of two subjects, this is no problem. In my case, however, some of the courses I would have to take in order to fulfill a major were less interesting to me than a screenwriting class or environmental law and policy course. Unfortunately, there are only so many hours in the day. In order to fulfill two majors, you have to be committed to dedicating a majority of your schedule to those two disciplines, leaving little room for outside exploration–at least, in comparison to the copious amount of room Barnard provides in its standard curriculum. 

For many people, primarily studying two disciplines they are passionate about is anything but constrictive. For me, however, it was beginning to hinder my development as a growing intellectual. I was still adhering to standards I had decided for myself when I was 16 years old. I have different interests and newfound passions, and even different career goals from when I was 16, just beginning to take SATs and researching Barnard College.

Essentially, I chose self-acceptance rather than failure. I decided not to double major not because it is too difficult or stressful, but because I value being able to build my own curriculum. In taking specific courses and acquiring tools I know will be beneficial for my future, rather than sticking to two rigid curriculums and wishing I ventured beyond those disciplines later in life. After all, college is about exploration and growth–especially since life after Barnard does not exist in Divergent-like factions either.  

So, yes, I am only one major, but I have not failed my 16-year-old self. Quite the contrary, in fact. I chose specification within my fields of interest rather than a general overview of two of them. I chose quality over quantity. In the end, deciding not to double major was the right decision for me. Of course, double majoring is the best decision for many other Barnard students. It all depends on what you, as a student, want from your education. 

Currently, I am an English major with a Theatre concentration, which, since the English department has an incredibly flexible and customizable curriculum, completely satisfies my need for intellectual liberty. As a single major, I have space in my schedule to further my newfound curiosities as a minor in Environmental Science and by taking plenty of Film classes. Still, I am cognizant that my journey at Barnard and as a student is far from the end. Therefore, I am no longer opposed to tweaking my major/minor/concentration consortium as necessary as I continue to grow as a person at Barnard.

Choice and customization are luxuries that come with being a Barnard student. However, as all freedoms do, they come with a tremendous amount of responsibility.